Sometimes, you have to accept things that are out of your league. It hurts so much that your face can't even handle to face it. I am not a strong person. I cry when I fail. I rejoice when I succeed. People may label me as weak but deep down in my heart, I know there are things in life that only I have while others don't. It's hard to accept in my part that my name wasn't able to be screwed in a pedestal.

Those metaphorical words might not be the exact thoughts that are running in my head after being involved in an event that I didn't expect to happen in my UP life. Everyone's harsh in the university. A part of those people are the professors. Nonetheless, they're not whom I encountered recently.

I got invited on a lunch date by one of my orgmates. No idea was brought in my mind until the day itself. I was introduced with a bunch of 'empowered' ladies. They seemed happy in their current state, I suppose. The clock read 1pm and I'm already sitting on a table facing people that I think overpower my aura.

Great. Just great. Sorrority recruitment.

Not that I'm against with them or I'm stereotyping them as bitches, comfortability didn't come in handy. They're accommodating and funny. I actually enjoyed their 'speaker's' stories. She mainly talks about their empowered sisters and the reliability they offer within their sisterhood. A part of me was actually enticed of joining not until the interview. Come on! I'm not a good interviewer. What more if I'm the one put on the spot to be interviewed? At the end of the interview, I really wanted to congratulate myself.

Congratulations Krisha. You just made a complete fool of yourself.

I just cant accept the fact that I'm not that witty. My weakness is public speaking. I can't fully express my thoughts without having to draft it and practice for several times. It's like an improptu 'impromptu speech'. They ask something and 5 seconds, I'm expected to answer. Much harsher was we're two interviewees. There's a chance that our answers will be compared and judged after. Keenly observing what happened that time, I won first runner up. I may sound sour graping but I was the underdog that time. When a question was asked, I was always the first one pursued to give out answer. Thus, it leaves the other to thing for about 1-2 mins.

I hate that fact.

Anyway, I already moved on from that incident. But a heart bump keeps on coming everytime I think about it.

A big hooray for my 19th birthday. Yes, I'm already in my 4th year in college yet still remain in teenage years. Val is 20 as well as Nons. 'A big LOL there. The age difference is really something. I guess, if I just started a year later, my life would be different.

Yes, different. Or is it my environment?

Harsh.

I treated my friends out for lunch. Oops, I still wasn't able to treat Nons and Val. They're actually requesting for eat-all-you can breakfast at Something Fishy in Eastwood.

Too far... Too pricey...

I treated my department friends at Shakey's in SM North. We even ordered ice cream bar (eat-all-you-can sundae as long as you can tower it up and not fall. I think we overestimated ourselver. We just agreed to have a dare. The one who'll lose on the round is required to eat. We were like, "Hindi na ko kakain ng sundae sa isang taon!" which I think is highly possible from the trauma we got eating that sundae tower. April, Cid, Niña and Hazel surprised me later on with a Spongebob water jug! I was really surprised and happy. I feel acknowledged that day. A lot of people greeted me and my orgmates sang Happy Birthday to me twice.

I feel loved for the first time.

Of course, I needed to share the happiness to my relatives. My mom and I went to our relatives in UP. Ofcourse, we celebrated my birthday. They cooked pansit for me and a cousin of mime treated me with cake. Truly a wonderful birthday.

Karma. The balance of life for Krisha. ♥